Friday, December 20, 2013

Cat nap

Fake it

Sometimes when I am feeling out of sorts the best thing I can do is lift something heavy.

Last night I trained with Steve and it was possibly the best session we have ever had.

For no other reason then I worked harder then I have ever worked, and I pretty much used the hour as a therapy session. Which I am pretty sure worked.

I feel almost OK today. Almost like I am coming off some super powerful drug and the withdrawals are starting to subside...and yet  -

Allie has her holiday "party" and concert this afternoon, I honestly don't think I can stomach one more fake smile.

Thursday, December 19, 2013


So when days are filled with uncertainty, when life is upside down.

This is the only thing that matters.

Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Life has been crazy.
Sounds so trite, and uncomplicated. But Christmas is next week and I can't even focus on one thing longer than four seconds before I am on to the next.
Christmas Presents need to be wrapped, the Christmas tree is missing half of its ornaments....We have nothing hanging outside, no lights, no cards have gone out.
I somehow in the midst of my life had a few opportunities to work on a TV pilot ..with one HUGE opportunity thrown in there, that I grabbed a hold of and ran with....leaving me feeling a little hung over and buzzing from adrenaline.

Its strange to bounce from one thing to the next trying to stay grounded, trying to figure out if you are happy with the here and now.

Trying to figure out exactly what is in store, what's the plan, am I going in the right direction.
Sometimes I think I am, and other times I end up sobbing on the bathroom floor.

I guess that's just life